The Black Caps are a festering boil

The Man in the Stand, Yahoo! New Zealand Sport August 9, 2012, 9:24 am

So much good news currently abounds on our sporting front.

I can only assume that's why our muddled Black Caps captain desperately wanted to share in some of the feel-good vibes when he was desperate to point out that there were positives to be taken from the latest Black Caps debacle.

Losing 8 out of 9 games on tour amounts to a full-on disaster and having Ross Taylor telling us that Martin Guptill's batting was ok or it was an invaluable experience for the young members is simply patronising nonsense.

In fact, Ross Taylor's namby-pamby style is really starting to get to me and leads me to the five most critical home truths this excuse for our national cricket team needs to confront.

1. Ross Taylor has had his time in charge and along with John Wright, needs to take the exit door.

His captaincy ambles along and appears hesitant and waiting for something to happen.

He mumbles in interviews in half-truths clutching at irrelevant, itsy-bitsy, weak excuses.

He is a cardboard cut-out of a leader of men.

So who should be captain you ask?

The best of the three to four young enthusiasts in the team with captaincy experience who will grow into the role and show twice the enthusiasm Taylor does.

And that probably precludes Brendon McCullum who appears to have made IPL and the cash-grabbing that goes with it his overwhelming priority.

2. Dan Vettori is a relic who has become bigger than the game here in New Zealand.

Dan drops in and out of whatever form of the game tickles his fancy and his wallet at the time.

The only predictable fact today about this once notable all-rounder is his total inability to take test wickets when it counts.

The last time he spun the Black Caps to victory feels like it was around the time when six o'clock closing was extended.

3. Dan Vettori's apparent, honorary, life-long membership of the actual playing XI doesn't just stop there.

Such is his mana and the friendships he's formed, he has the power to drag along with him tired old has-beens like Jake the Fake Oram and partial has-beens like Kyle Mills and Chris Martin.

It's way past time that Vettori who's a distant memory of his former glory, Oram who's a professional crock, Mills who's lost all of his impact and Martin whose fading, whirly-gig, strike bowling ability warrants his inclusion less and less when he bats and fields like an eleven-year old.

4. It's time to put an end to the tail wagging the dog, however thin our talent-base is at any one time.

Brendon McCullum is so close to a free agent, his contract appears worthless. He turned up in the Caribbean when it suited him.

The IPL and the swags of riches are his masters, not his country.

Again, I say good on him but let's not fool ourselves that such a blatant lack of accountability is going to ever breed depth and consistency in the best interests of the game in this country.

Cut him loose and give him the time to weigh up whether his bank balance or that cap with the silver fern on it means more.

5. And finally, it must never,ever happen again where a redundant coach who had handed in his badge and had lost all interest in the job before the tour started be put in charge for an upcoming tour.

The Black Caps are a festering boil on an otherwise pretty rosy sporting landscape in New Zealand right now.

We can only hope that the new coach, Mike Hesson sees the need to confront the issues above with haste.

Your thoughts please.

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  1. 08:10am Saturday 11th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    nz cricket could half pays and start a junior domestic 20/20 comp with prizes to lure kids to cricket, pump the money into young players, even put them on retainers at 14 years old, im envolved with highschool cricket 1st 11, thers some excellent talent there, kids scoring hundreds then taking 5 wickets but thet think crickets gay, and wont be playing when they leave school, create tough tournments with pay for these kids.

  2. 08:04am Saturday 11th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    too many mates in the team too, vettori and mills are like school kids together, having a giggle here and there,no more cricket for new zealand till we get our backyard game sorted first, kids grow up on playstations and facebook now, hadlee and fleming would have been up a 530am mowing a cricket pitch in mums garden waiting for the neighbours kids to arrive for the days play, we have got lazy as a nation, parents cant control kids nor can schools, it starts there!!!

  3. 07:57am Saturday 11th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    year after year, we play teams who have just come off tough series, wi just played england for example, our team comes straight off our winter, bowling in nets etc, lets stop nz playing internationals for 3 years while we restructure our game.performance based salary, no pay for losses. sad time for nz cricket, another problem is tv rights have destroyed the game here, how can we support them, when all we see is wickets tumble on the highlights on the news??

  4. 04:28pm Friday 10th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    We should just disband the Cricket team, it is poitnless throwin good money into bad players who only care about earning money in the sub continent.

  5. Jordan08:12am Friday 10th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    Gayle & Pietersen understand they have chosen the T20 circuit where they can make millions annually...good for them I guys run to Japan...if I was 25 I'd be playing ONLY the T20...heck even a chump like Styris can be successful so anyone can make it...

  6. Jordan08:10am Friday 10th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    Far be it for me to defend any of these club players...but face are 25...can make $US800,000 for 6 weeks of bash and in 5 star hotels...bring out your family or girlfriend...are cheered by 100,000 just for walking on the part of the worst NZ team in history and do this for peanuts???.....where would your focus lie?

  7. Paul09:56pm Thursday 09th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse


  8. underarm_bowler07:18pm Thursday 09th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    NZ cricket is always good for a laugh. Long live the Trevor Chappell underarm delivery, our finest moment in sport.

  9. UDAY05:23pm Thursday 09th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    Pump some more monetary rewards in the sport, at home. Send the Black Caps to train in India where the sheer passion for the game will give our lads the missing adrenalin rush. It should be noted that Wright could do little wrong in the sub-continent.

  10. tom05:16pm Thursday 09th August 2012 NZSTReport Abuse

    At the International Sports Losers of the Year Awards.Held in Irag--where everyone is a Loser.Top Award goes to"The New Zealand Black Collapsers Cricket team.".Worst Captain of a Losing Side goes to --"R Faylor-Captin of the Black Collapsers".Worst New Loser in an International debut is"R Wagner from the Award Winning Loser Black Collapsers".Most Tiresome and Lazy Loser of the year in an International team goes to--R Oram, from-you guessed it folks-the Black Collapsers."--And the top award folks-"For the ultimate Overpaid-Overglamourised-Over rated-Over after over of Boringly BoredomAward-Mr Vittori from the illustrious and Ultimate losers--the Black Collapsers".The crowd rise to their feet and boo!!

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